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May 2008

May 04, 2008

American Heroes and Madmen, #1

            acrylic on paper, 3x5" Boston_corbett_3

First in a series, "American Heroes and Madmen", Sgt. Boston Corbett was credited with hunting down and plugging Abraham Lincoln assassin John Wilkes Booth with his trusty .38.

Corbett was almost delusional in his preoccupation with Christianity. He would shout out "Praise Jesus!" and the like in somewhat inappropriate situations. Often when speaking, he would inexplicably tack an extra "er" suffix to the ends of words, thus making his outbursts of Christian rapture sound even more odd during less than extraordinary everyday conversations.

Celebrated as a hero after his brush with destiny in the Garrett's barn (after he was, oddly enough, arrested and held briefly as an accomplice in Lincoln's shooting), Corbett moved to Kansas where he was given a job as an "assistant" doorman at the state court house. He blew that gig by pointing his .38 at the state legislature after he was insulted by what he felt was a blasphemous remark. He was taken out in cuffs and eventually sent to an insane asylum in Topeka.

After escaping the asylum on horseback, Corbett continued down his path of eccentricity, growing his hair out very long to emulate Jesus, and living in a hole he dug for himself in Concordia, KS. Not a "shelter", or "underground lair", mind you... a HOLE.

While residing in his, erm, hole away from home, he TOOK A PAIR OF SCISSORS AND CASTRATED HIMSELF in order to cure his desire for prostitutes.

And that, my friends, is why Boston Corbett was a hero and a madman.

May 01, 2008

Ideal cock

CockThis is my proposed life partner. The control panel offers such diverse services as vibrate, warm up, inseminate, make a living, cook, clean, and sympathize. An optional cuddling unit  is being researched.